Reflections

She had called to tell me about the mistakes the young man had made. We were both advocates for this student but it seemed that each time he successfully completed three steps forward, he'd take five steps back. On the surface, it almost looked deliberate. As if it was a test of our character to still believe in him or to let him go. We agreed that this incident might better become a life lesson for him and that as much as we wanted to will him into not acting this way, we didn't have complete control over his responses. He'd learn through that response and these were the years when we wanted him to learn all this and not later in life or never. She promised to be there for him to help him process the decision he was making even if it was the wrong one.  Naysayers will proclaim he never deserved the chance we were giving him. I've been thinking a lot about the topic of equity lately...as it relates to so many things: school funding, resources, gender, race, reli...

Some of my best conversations are with colleagues in similar positions in other districts. At this time of year, many of us are reflecting on how the year went. We share successes and not so successes. Some of us share plans about moving on to a different district while others of us find resolve to do better right where we are! I recently read this post by Jay Posick and was struck by how many of his goals could easily be mine. I used to be part of a #middleleaders voxer group with Jay and I can tell you one thing. He sets the bar HIGH for himself. I'd listen in time and time again and realize he was crushing it as a principal, as a human being. There was so much more I could be doing and did because I learned with Jay. Jay's goals are organized around 3 ideas: Be Better for Kids Be Better for Staff Be Better for Families I really like the way he organizes the action steps around each. His post then reminded me of a chalkboard I once saw at an exhibit in Dollywood...

I've had some quiet moments in this office over the last two weeks. The bustle of school is noticeably absent. I'm working on completing a lot of required paperwork. In the quiet of the day, my mind will wander and I keep revisiting two stories from this year that taught me so much. Story #1 The parent was adamant she didn't know her son was going to be placed in an integrated classroom. Her child was a general education student and didn't need the supports that the "other kids" needed. She demanded her son be moved to a different classroom. The principal stood firm and assured the parent that her son was in an incredible classroom with amazing teachers. The parent eventually gave up asking for a different placement.  What could not have been predicted is what happened after that decision. Her son became close friends with a young girl in the class. A beautiful, funny, spunky, brilliant girl who also happens to be on the autism spectrum.   When...

Next week, I have an interview scheduled with a teacher candidate that will not remember me when we meet. When I reviewed her paperwork, I remembered her instantly! In fact, she was one of my many supervisors during one of my more formal employment experiences. I was a college student studying special education and in search of a summer job that both fit the resume I was trying to build but allowed me the chance to live away from home. Becoming a camp counselor did just that! I was hired my first year as a CIT (Counselor in Training) and then moved up to counselor. The following summer, I was able to work at the Headquarters Station running basic logistics for the campground. I learned to make announcements, create and follow schedules, perform emergency drills, and interact with various members of the camp community. I was woefully underqualified to become a camp counselor. I still can't pick poison ivy out in the woods and scream at alarming decibels at the sight of snakes. I...

Father's Day used to be a tough holiday for me. When I was younger, I felt left out as if a bigger spotlight was being shone on the fact that I was the child of a single mother. That my brother and I didn't have the strong, constant male influence our friends had. Thankfully, looking back, I can see where uncles and fathers of friends stood in when they could. I didn't connect those dots back then but I do now...as a parent looking back through the eyes of a child. I am incredibly grateful to each of them. He Didn't Have to Be - Brad Paisley "Lookin' back all I can say about all the things he did for me Is I hope I'm at least half the dad that he didn't have to be.." As I've gotten older and worked with more and more students, I've seen how the lack of a father figure significantly impacts self-esteem. So today, I am thinking about what some of the most resilient kids I've ever met don't have.  It causes me to u...

We were making small talk at the end of a meeting. Each of us lamenting on the loss of two celebrities this week to suicide. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US. The talk turned to how much pain people carry with them. As educators, we try to do a lot for students and providing supports around mental health. I've been fortunate enough to be in this field for over 24 years and have seen the improvements we've made around elevating school counseling supports that are necessary, and not optional, in schools. We've added social work supports, on site mental health clinics, and social emotional curriculums and more to so many of our schools.  It is true that our students have increasing needs than ever before and the need for additional supports will grow.  Yet, what could we be contributing to the sadness and stress others are feeling? Even inadvertently? I wonder what improvements we've ma...

June 7, 2018 I read the text message as it came across my phone today and could hardly believe it. A friend from my former district was reaching out to tell me about the passing of an incredible woman I used to know. I read the text to myself and took a deep breath. This week has already been a tough week personally and this is the drop that causes the bucket to overflow. I begin to hold back tears. It's the last straw for my heart. I feel selfish for even being stuck in the problems of this week. Those problems aren't real pain. Thinking of her saying goodbye to her family, her beloved daughter and husband --- that's pain. Real, actual, pain. I thought about this incredible woman and how she always made time for me when she saw me in my previous community. Our kids grew up together and were very close for some of that time. She treated my son like her child and made room for him with her family on a whim's notice. She and her husband were always so kind to him. ...