Let The Words Fall Out

She stands before the group and begins to tell her story. It's a deep and dark collection of memories. It's her story and the way she is sharing it with all of us is just so raw. It's so sad. It takes me back to different days. Still, that rawness makes it beautiful and real. I want to tell her I can relate to some of it but I don't.

Another warrior I know asks me to sit with her and she begins to tell me a story about her marriage. It's messy and complicated. I do little more than listen and remind her how incredible she is. I want to tell her I have felt that same messiness before but I don't.

He keeps repeating the same lines to me about what has happened and I fade in and out of listening trying to remember what it's like to be a teenager. I think about how hard it was. How many mistakes are made. I think back to the many I made. I'm still ashamed of some all these years later.  I want to protect him from growing up too fast. I think about just explaining all of that -- all of this --- to him, but I don't.

Perhaps I don't do any of these things because the time just doesn't feel right. Perhaps I don't say something more because of other reasons. Maybe I'm just scared. I keep the words all in.

Yet, I know that at the very basic level, everyone shares so many struggles -- human to human. There is so much in common but we will, at times, withhold that commonality.  Someone somewhere along the way decided being vulnerable was a bad thing. What if it's not bad at all?

What if it's the complete opposite?

Standing before a group of educators to share your story hoping it impacts the future experiences of so many of our students is brave! Sitting with a trusted friend and sharing how much your heart is hurting is certainly courageous.  And stopping to admit past mistakes hoping someone else can learn from them is valorous. 

There is little about our work, inside and outside of our schools, that is easy. The more we learn to lean on each other, the more we realize how much we need each other.  The more we share our courage, the clearer our purpose can become. 

The more we let our words fall out, the more we find the connections between us that have been there all along. 

Brave - Sara Bareilles

"Nothing's gonna hurt you the way that words do

And they settle 'neath your skin

Kept on the inside and no sunlight

Sometimes a shadow wins

But I wonder what would happen if you

Say what you wanna say

And let the words fall out

Honestly I wanna see you be brave..."